Manliness

“You’re out of poptarts,” Peyton called from the kitchen. “Are you listening to me?” she asked coming to sit next to me on the couch.

I turned the volume up. “Yes I am.”

“Oh. Well did you hear me say that you’re out of poptarts?”

I nodded. “Yes I did.”

She looked at me. “Are you going to get more?”

I sighed not taking my eyes away from the television. “Eventually.”

“You should get on that,” she said.

I shook my head. “You know what I don’t understand, how you moved out yet you’re always here and stealing my food. Especially my poptarts,” I mumbled.

She shrugged. “I just feel lonely there. It’s too big. Plus I get bored,” she said.

I nodded keeping my eyes on the television. They were talking about Sidney and how the
Penguins season was going so far. “Oh, well then I guess it’s alright,” I smiled.

“Is everything fine between you guys now? I saw him go to the bathroom yesterday and I’m assuming he went to talk to you,” she told me.

I glanced at her and back to the screen. I winced my eyes shut at the question flashbacks of yesterday replaying in my head. I forced my eyes open and looked at Peyton. I forced a small smile on my face. “Yeah, everything’s fine. Don’t worry.”

She eyed me carefully. “If you say so.” She checked her watch. “The game’s about to start soon. Wanna watch it together?”

“Why so early?”

She shrugged. “I’m not sure. They don’t usually play Saturday games so early.

“Sure we can watch it together,” I said. I flipped the channel to the pregame show and leaned my head back on the couch. I took in a deep breath and replayed yesterday. He had taken me home and I couldn’t forget the adorable smile he had when he told me goodbye. He didn’t do anything, but he was incredibly sweet and hugged me. I remember I couldn’t stop grinning like an idiot. I couldn’t sleep with the amount of butterflies in my stomach. My eyes slowly began to close, as I grew calmer.

“Oh my God look Brooke!” Peyton screamed slapping my arm hard.

I went to the side rubbing my arm glaring at her. “What?” I hissed.

“They’re interviewing Max,” she screeched turning the volume up.

“Max are you confident going into today’s game against the Lightning?” asked Dan Potash
pointing the mike over to him.

“Yeah, you know I mean as confident as anyone can be. Obviously they’re having a good season so far and their offense has really been picking up and you want to bring you’re A game and be prepared for how they play,” he responded.

“And you’re points have taken a little drop. Do you hope to change that today?”

He laughed. “Yeah you know you always try your hardest and hope to score for your team. So hopefully I can make a couple of goals to help my team out.”

Dan shook his hand. “Thank you Max and good luck today.”

“Thanks,” he smiled walking away.

“Did you see that? He was so professional and humble about his scoring,” she swooned.

I shook my head and rolled my eyes as Dan went on to talk about the Lightning’s defense. I glanced back between the television and Peyton. A small smile came across my face. “You really like him,” I observed.

Peyton glanced over at me and smiled sheepishly. “Yeah.”

“I’ve never seen you like this over anyone,” I pointed out. “You seem happy.”

She nodded. “I am. I know it seems stupid since we just started this and everything but we’ve known each other for a while and he’s really sweet. I know it seems like he’s not the
most smartest or serious guy-”

“No,” I interrupted. “You know that I don’t feel like that. I’m just joking around. He seems like a great guy.”

“He is,” she reassured me. “He’s incredibly nice and makes sure I’m taken care of. He helped me unpack and made sure I had everything I needed. And he even worries about you. not only with this whole Sidney thing but you in general and that you can trust him. He’s the first guy in a really long time that I’ve liked in a while,” she explained.

I placed my hand on her shoulder and smiled. “Good. I’m happy for you. really.”

“I know. Thanks. It means a lot to me.” she smiled thankfully and returned her attention back to the tv.
-------------------------

I bit my lip hoping that they would get a goal here. There were only five minutes left in the third period and they were down by one. Stamkos and St. Louis had both put in one goal in the second period and were coming on strongly offensively. Sidney had scored the only goal the entire game.

“Come on,” Peyton muttered next to me.

I leaned in closer to the television watching the puck intently and not taking my eyes off the Lightning’s defense. They were coming at them strong and managed to block several shots, but the guys never let the puck go back into their zone.

“They’ve got to make these goals in,” she told me.

I nodded, not taking my eyes off the screen. Sidney’s line had just come back on as Geno raced to retrieve the puck and passed it over to Dupuis. He managed to make a few good passes to Sidney but lost it when Ryan Malone poked it away. Kris swiftly skated to the puck and passed it over to Pascal again. He skated down the ice continuously passing it over to Kris. Once he was near the net he passed it down the ice to Sidney who had no one near him. He made his way down the ice as Kris blocked St. Louis and the other guys did their best to block the other players.

“Blocker side Sidney. Come on,” I said sitting up straighter and rubbing my hands together from how nervous I was.

“Please make this in,” Peyton said after me.

As if he somehow heard me telepathically, he skated to the right which caused Rolouson to move to that side leaving empty space. Sidney quickly faked a shot and then whipped the puck blocker side almost missing it and tying the game.

“Yes!” Peyton and I screamed high-fiving each other.

The crowd stood up cheering as Sidney raised his arms in celebration. The guys went over and completely tackled him to the boards celebrating. They were screaming in happiness and were over excited as if this was a playoff game. They were all high-fiving and patting each other on the head.

Dan called out something as the team congratulated him and Max, Jordan, and Tyler came out on the ice. Max leaned down and had a determined look on his face as he was going into the faceoff. The second the puck dropped his stick quickly pushed it over to Tyler Kennedy. He skated down the ice passing it to Jordan. The Lightning somehow couldn’t keep up and were still on the other end of the ice. Jordan spun around and handed the puck over to Max before he was slammed into the boards. Max wasted no time getting near the ice and saw two defensemen coming at him. He quickly went around them and around the net. Rolouson was still looking the other way and couldn’t see where the puck went. Just as Max was around the net he quickly slid the puck in scoring the second point with a shorthanded goal. Again, the siren went off as people rose to their feet roaring in glee. Max celebrated and went over to his teammates.

“Yes,” I cheered clapping my hands together. Peyton and I high-fived again.

“Only a minute left,” Peyton grinned.

I smiled hugely watching the seconds tick away slowly. 50, 49, 48. Sidney’s line was back out on the ice as I clasped my hands together. Geno shoved and after a long while took the puck from St. Louis and skated down the ice. 20, 19, 18, 17. Pascal was passed the puck who was dodging players trying to poke it away. All the meanwhile Kris and Brooks had made their way down the ice to block players. 10, 9, 8. Pascal made one swift turn and shot it over to Sidney. 7, 6, 5. People were already holding onto their caps. Without hesitation, he slapped the puck into the net right in between Rolouson’s legs. 4, 3, 2. For the last time, the siren went off as people went nuts and were cheering and shouting out for the Penguins. Hats went flying onto the ice almost immediately as Sidney pumped his fist in the air. The whole team came off the benches and threw themselves onto him. They were cheering and rolling around thrilled with the win. The final score was 4-2.

Peyton and I jumped up hugging each other and cheering for them as well. We were smiling like idiots staring at the overjoyed people at Consol Energy Center.

Peyton’s phone went off as she pulled her phone out and looked at it. she looked back up at me. “Max wants me to come down there. He said he wants to celebrate with me,” she mumbled smiling.

“That’s nice,” I smiled.

She shrugged. “Yeah, I think I’m going to head down there now.”

I nodded. “Alright. Have fun.”

“Are you going to be alright here? If you want you can come. I’m sure he wont mind. Plus you can say hi to the rest of the guys,” she said.

I shook my head. “I’m fine Peyton. You don’t have to feel bad because you have Max. Seriously,” I told her.

She looked down seeming to debate whether she should go or not before sighing. “Ok, but if you need anything. Call me alright? I’ll come as fast as I can,” she assured.

I laughed. “Peyton go. Have fun. And congratulate Max for me.” she smiled before grabbing her jacket and making her way out the door.

I sighed turning around to look at the empty apartment and placed my hand on my hips. I decided to clean which there really was no point to since it was already as clean as it could be. After trying to change things around in the bathroom I took a shower.

Once I got out it was only 6. I put on some old jeans and an undershirt with a sweater over. I sat down on the couch again and flipped through the channels trying to find something good. I finally settled on a Friends marathon.

About two minutes in, my mind wandered off to what Sidney was doing. It wasn’t until then that I wondered what would happen now. If he was freaked out or would never speak to me again. I wondered if maybe I shouldve gone with Peyton just to see him and make sure he wasn’t uncomfortable and I could make an excuse that I simply came to congratulate the guys.

There was a knock as I looked over at the door debating whether or not I should actually open it. I stared intently at the door, hoping it would open by realized it wasn’t working and only causing me a headache. I sighed and trudged to the door shaking my head of my previous thoughts and how pathetic they were.

I pulled the door open only to see a black shirt. I slowly brought my gaze up to meet Sidney's.

“Hey,” he greeted.

“Hey,” I said slightly surprised. It took a while for me to process him standing in front of me before I got a hold of myself. “Come in,” I motioned with my hand.

“Thanks,” he said stepping in with his hands in his pockets.

I crossed my arms as I did when I got nervous and slowly rocked back and forth. The room suddenly grew very uncomfortable as I took in a breath.

“So how are you?” he asked not looking directly at me.

I nodded. “I’m good. And yourself?”

“Good,” he nodded.

I nodded again looking around for something to do or say. “Do you want something to drink?”

He shrugged. ”That’d be nice.”

“Is tea alright?”

He nodded. “Do you mind if I use your bathroom?”

“No,” I said shaking my head. “It’s right there,” I pointed down past the kitchen.

He walked by me and down kitchen as I poured some water into the kettle and placed it on the stove. I opened the cupboard and took out two mugs and got the tea bags out.

Sidney came back out after a while and walked into the kitchen. “I saw Peyton and Max together,” he told me, the atmosphere already seeming more relaxed.

“Really?”

“Yeah, he was pretty excited after that game and went running to Peyton. They seemed like
two little kids and he couldn’t stop talking about how great he was,” he said with a smile.

I laughed. “I could only imagine how entertaining it must be especially with Peyton’s personality.”

“Yeah, the guys always love watching them. They’re always so energetic,” he said taking a
seat at the table.

I turned around once the water was hot and a whistle came from the kettle. I poured the water into both cups and grabbing them to place them on the table. “You weren’t so bad yourself,” I told him smirking.

A tiny smile grew on his face. “Really?”

I laughed. “Of course. You got a hat trick, again. I’m starting to think you don’t think you’re as good as you actually are you know.”

He let out a small laugh. “Actually I will admit that it did feel pretty good. I didn’t think I was going to score but then I did. It felt amazing,” he admitted.

I smiled at how honest he was being and how his eyes shined when he talked about it. “I’m sure it did. You played a great game,” I told him.

“I’m glad you think so,” he smiled drinking his tea.

“When do you play them again?”

He gulped down his tea looking down at the cup. “Sometime in two weeks,” he said. “In Florida.”

I tilted my head wondering why he wasn’t looking at me, then realizing why he grew so serious. “Sidney,” I said placing my hand on top of his causing him to stiffen up but relaxing
soon after. “It’s ok.”

He looked at me. “I just, I feel like I have to tell you that I’ll be gone and want to make sure you’re aware of that.”

I sighed. “Sidney, I’m aware of how big deal you are. I know that you’ll be on the road a lot or doing commercials, or publicity things that will prevent me from seeing you a whole lot, but I can deal. I mean I wont like it, but I know that it’s your job and I have to accept it don’t worry about me. for once,” I shrugged. “Worry about yourself. Please.”

He gave me a tiny smile looking down at our hands. “Ok,” he said softly.

I glanced down giving his hand a slight squeeze causing him to look up at me. “I’m always going to be here for you. I hope you know by now you can tell me anything. I’ve tried my best to help you and you can always count on me for anything, ok?” I looked him directly in the eye so he’d know I was serious. “I’m not going anywhere,” I told him.

He furrowed his eyebrows at my sternness but smiled and nodded. “Thank you Brooke, for everything. You understand,” he said.

I shrugged picking up the cups to bring them over to the sink. “Well, I am a very understanding person,” I said nonchalantly.

He let out a small laugh. “I’ve always thought so,” he replied. “Kris thought so too you know. He really liked you.”

I felt my eyes widen and my face warm up as I stopped and turned around. “I, uhm, how did you know about that?”

“Well, Max isn’t really the secret type,” he pointed out. “He didn’t mean to let it slip but it just came out. Kris had told him so,” he trailed off.

I ran a hand through my hair. “Yeah, uh, he did.”

“You know I think he still likes you. He was the one who kept saying so many good things about you.”

I raised my eyebrows in surprise. “Really?”

He nodded. “Yeah, although Geno was definitely more forward with you,” he laughed.

I closed my eyes forcing out an awkward laugh. “I’m guessing Max told you about that as well?”

He laughed. “Yes, but it’s not Max’s fault he cant not talk for a second.”

I laughed. “Guess not. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about it.”

“Why didn’t you?” he asked.

“I just didn’t know where we stood. I mean before it would have been awkward and then I wasn’t sure what this was. So it just sort of slipped my mind,” I finished.

“I get it,” he nodded.

I bit my lip before turning to face him. “Can I ask you a question?” he nodded. “What made you change your mind about this whole relationship thing?”

He thought for a moment before answering. “Remember that day you and I were on the ice and I was teaching you to skate?” I nodded. “I remember you trying to skate and trying to push the puck at the same time and you somehow snuck it by me and made it in,” he explained with a soft laugh. “That’s when I knew that you were the one who I wanted to change this whole dating thing for. When I first met you, I knew that I wanted to talk to you and be your friend. Then that day when we were with Craig’s kids, I knew that I wanted you to be more than a friend but that you would never consider it because of my career and how little you would see me. But then I knew, I knew that you were strong and could handle it and that you’d understand,” he told me.

“So you want to have a relationship now?” I asked not taking my eyes off him.

He shrugged. “I guess I’m just tired of being lonely. Every time I see the guys on my team with their wives and children or their girlfriends, I do get kind of jealous. I swore to myself that I’d never ask for anything else if I got to play in the NHL. And then I wont all these amazing things, and the Cup, and have a great team, but I don’t have anyone to share it with. I couldn’t tell anyone what I was feeling or going through. And I felt like I didn’t deserve a relationship with anyone because I was already given so much and my life was fine the way it was. Every time we would do something for the community or for charity, the wives would arrange most of it and we would just show up. They would all talk and all the guys would go on about their wives and children and the things they did. I just stood there nodding my head and listening to all of them. I would go off and do interviews or take pictures because it was better than hearing them talking about their amazing home lives. And I had no one. I didn’t even see my family too often and I was all by myself. I guess I never really thought how bad it would get. I always assumed I’d have the few single guys on the team as friends. But then they got older and some of them married and I was still alone with no one beside me,” he explained.

“So you see now that you cant just be alone for the rest of your life. That you have to talk to someone about everything you go through and that you need to let it out,” I said.

He smiled softly. “I do get it now. I don’t want to be lonely anymore. I’m ready to have someone to share this amazing life with.”

I looked at him intently, listening to every word he was saying. Explaining how alienated he felt surrounded by all the husbands and fathers on the team with their own wives. How he didn’t have anyone to talk to or share his success with. It felt like the other conversations we had and he was saying everything he felt all over again. Only this time, something was different. He was more enlightened and accepting. He accepted the fact that he couldn’t be alone anymore and that he didn’t want to be. I gave him a tiny smile. “I’m glad. Good for you.” I looked down. “Do you mind if I ask you another question?”

“No, go ahead.”

I sighed. “Where do we stand with this? I mean what happens now?”

He sat up straighter and took in a deep breath. “Now? This,” he whispered leaning in. he placed a hand on my face and drew me closer to him. He attached his lips to mine and moved his hand up to my hair. It took me a while to process, but once I had, I placed my hand on his cheek and moved in closer.

After a while he pulled back and smirked. “That’s what happens,” he spoke softly. He glanced down and took my hand caressing it with his finger.

I smiled. “I’m glad you kissed me since you know I did make the first move,” I joked.

He laughed. “Yeah, well I had to regain my manliness somehow.” I laughed along with him. “I sort of told Max,” he mumbled.

“What?”

“He noticed that I was in a different mood and wouldn’t stop asking me what was up and I
wouldn’t tell him. Eventually before the game I was talking to Marc and he asked me if there was something different. So I told him but Max was eavesdropping and heard. He said he wouldn’t tell anyone, but I’m not sure if I believed him,” he said laughing.

“Oh, it’s ok. He had to fid out sometime. Plus, I’m sure he had a hunch of something. Max may not be the quietest or the smartest but he does know some things,” I pointed out.
he nodded smiling, trying to hide his yawn by turning the other way. “I’m tired.”

“Do you want to go home?”

He gave me a sheepish look. “If you don’t mind.”

I shook my head. “Of course not. You played a great game. You should be exhausted. Go home and rest. You deserve it,” I argued.

He slowly got up and stretched his arms up. He walked over by the door and put on his shoes. “We have a private practice tomorrow. Do you want to come? I’m sure Peyton will be there,” he assured.

I shrugged. “Yea, that’d be nice. If I wake up early enough, I’ll go.”

“Ok,” he smiled. I opened the door leaning against it. he turned around adjusting his cap before bending down to place a kiss on my cheek. “Goodbye, Brooke.”

“Bye Sidney,” I smiled slowly closing the door. I felt my cheeks warmer and walked into my room collapsing onto my bed.

I had watched some television before seeing it was about 10. My phone went off as I opened to see it was a message from Max. It said: So he went over after? Awww you guys are all grown up! I’m so proud! Don’t do anything to dirty…

I rolled my eyes closing my phone. I wondered if Peyton was home yet. If Max knew, would she? She would’ve told me something. I knew I had to tell her. I wanted to. She was my best friend. I bit my lip and picked up my phone, dialing her number. I lowered the volume hearing the rings on the other end.

“Hello?”

“Hey,” I said.

“Hey,” she greeted. “What’s up?”

“Nothing. How was dinner with Max?”

“It was good. He was so excited, it was sweet. But he seemed really tired so I sent him home to rest. Did you do anything after I left?”

I took in a deep breath. “Actually, yeah I did. That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.” I sighed and explained everything that happened. My speaking and her overly excited screams drowned out the television in the background. I’m glad I was the one telling her.